Why I am an Atheist

In 1903, Kentucky-based newspaper “Blue-grass Blade” asked its readers to write in and contribute to a forthcoming feature named, “Why I am An Atheist.” Hundreds of letters soon arrived and many were subsequently reprinted in the paper; over a century later, in 2011, they were compiled to form the book, Letters from an Atheist Nation.

Below is just one of the letters. It was written by Minnie Parrish, a 23-year-old divorced mother of four who later went on to become the first female doctor to practice in North Texas.

Why am I an Atheist

 

Because it has dawned upon me that it is right to be so, and upon investigation I find no real evidence of the divine origin of the scriptures. And because I cannot, as a refined and respectable woman, take to my bosom as a daily guide a book of such low morals and degrading influences. Written by a lot of priests, I cannot accept a salvation that is based wholly upon the dreams of an ancient and superstitious people, with no proof save blind faith.

 

Everything that so many people think transpires from the supernatural, and many things that would really perplex the average mind, have a natural and material foundation in the workings of the human mind; that is, things that are not connected with our solar system.

 

It is ignorance of the scientific working of their own natures and mind that keep so much “mystery” in the air; and as long as there is a mystery afloat the people will ascribe it to the supernatural.

 

I am an Atheist because I know the Bible will not do to depend upon. I have tried it, and found it wanting.

 

In fact, I found in the scriptures the origin of woman’s slayer, and that it was one of God‘s main points to oppress women and keep them in the realms of ignorance.

 

I am in the ranks of Liberalism because of its elevating principles, its broad road to freedom of thought, speech, and investigation.

 

MINNIE O. PARRISH
23 years old
Leonard, Texas

Letters of Note: Why I am an Atheist.

40 Things To Say Before You Die – Self Help

Before you’re sprawled on your deathbed, there are some things you really have to say. They’re not complicated. They’re not poetry.

They’re just short sentences with big meaning.

I hope they get you talking.

40
“I wonder.”

Give yourself time to think so the time you spend doing things will be better spent.

39
“Today was good.”

If you can say it once, you can say it again. And again. And again.

38
“I believe in this.”

A god, a plan, a company, a person, an idea—you have to put your faith in something.

37
“I’m not finished.”

Only you get to decide when your life’s work is done.

36
“Thank you for making this possible.”

Because nobody does anything alone. We’re driven and supported and thwarted by others at every turn.

35
“That’s enough.”

Food. Drink. Episodes of Law & Order. Pairs of shoes. Overtime. Articulating your own limits is powerful.

34
“I can do better.”

As soon as you say it, you’re that much closer to making it true.

33
“I’m sorry.”

But you can’t just say it; you have to mean it. Really mean it.

32
“I survived.”

Moments of danger are the plot points of an exciting life.

31
“You’re amazing.”

Let yourself be in awe of another person, and you’ll feel strong and weak simultaneously.

30
“I am home.”

Home is every adventure’s final destination and starting point—and we all need one to call our own.

29
“I did my best.”

If this is true, you did something amazing.

28
“How can I help you?”

Because you want people to come to your funeral, and if they can’t make it, at least they’ll miss you.

27
“I’m lucky.”

You are lucky, in a way that no one else is. Now, what are you going to do with your good fortune?

26
“I want that.”

Ask for it: that’s you get what you covet—from others and for yourself.

25
“This is wrong.”

If you never say it, you embody the statement.

24
“I quit.”

Not everything is worthwhile, and sometimes we don’t find that out until we’re in the middle of a rotten situation.

23
“Isn’t this beautiful?”

The more often you notice the gorgeous world around you, the happier you’ll be.

22
“Congratulations.”

Say this without jealously. Practice if you have to.

21
“Damn, I look good.”

You come from a long line of people who convinced others to sleep with them. Remember that.

20
“I can master this.”

The ability to learn is the foundation of every other talent.

19
“Hold the mayo.”

Ask for the little things on a regular basis and you’ll find that it’s easier to make larger demands on occasion.

18
“This is who I am.”

The nervous energy spent pretending to be something you’re not is better spent on practically anything else.

17
“Get out.”

It’s always harder to take back an invitation than to give one, but protecting yourself from personified trouble is always worth the effort.

16
“That was my contribution.”

Own what you’ve worked to create—that’s how your presence will be felt long after you’re gone.

15
“I’ll try it.”

Consider the impotence of never saying you’ll try.

14
“Tell me more.”

Really getting to know someone (or some topic) will help you better triangulate your own place in the world.

13“This is my favorite thing.”

Enjoy what you love and say this as often as you can.

12
“I earned this.”

There’s a layer of proud ownership over everything you possess that wasn’t merely given to you.

11
“I don’t care.”

Being able to discern between what’s important and what’s trivial is a skill that will save your sanity and your schedule.

10
“Your secret is safe with me.”

Because it feels deep-down good to be trustworthy.

9
“Eureka!”

Being the first to know something is a delicious sensation.

8
“Let’s go!”

Where you’re going often matters far less than the enthusiasm you have for the trip.

7
“I trust you.”

We all need allies, and admitting as much helps forge alliances.

6
“I don’t know how to do this.”

It’s better to admit it and learn than to fake it and embarrass yourself.

5
“I’m terrified.”

Fear is an asset. It can save you from danger and alert you to trouble. Don’t ignore the tingles that run up and down your spine.

4
“This is going to work.”

When this is said truthfully, it’s an assertion of power.

3
“I made a decision.”

Autonomy transforms any activity from a chore to an act of destiny.

2
“I love you.”

We all want to say this, and we all want it said to us.

1
“I understand.”

More important than being right, or being important, is being truly aware.

One-Minute Animated Primers on Major Theories of Religion

Last year, Open University brought us 60-Second Adventures in Thought — a fascinating and wonderfully animated series exploring six famous philosophy thought experiments. This season, they’re back with 60-Second Adventures in Religion — four short informative yet jocular primers on some major theories of religious studies, offering a fine addition to these essential meditations on faith.

The first introduces Karl Marx and his conception of religion as a vehicle of illusory happiness and a means of oppression and social control:

The second explores religion as ritual through the work of pioneering sociologist Isidore Auguste Marie François Xavier Comte, better-known as Auguste, who — like Alain de Botton today — tried to start a secular religion based on values of charity, order, and science:

The third episode paints religion as a mother through Swiss antiquarian and Roman law professor J. J. Bachofer’s theories of matriarchy:

The final installment explores religion as a virus, a concept proposed by Richard Dawkins, who famously coined the term “meme”:

20 Awesome Examples Of Literary Graffiti

I love graffiti, well most graffiti, it is one of my main loves in the city.  Really smart, well executed, thought-provoking graffiti can change my day.  It takes a blank wall and turns it into a daydream.  Granted, I deal with annoying graffiti weekly at work, scratches in our windows and so forth, that is vandalism.  Graffiti is art.  Challenge yourself to see beauty and inspiration in unconventional places, to look forward to seeing a piece of graffiti on your morning commute because of it’s meaning to you, to remember that that paint on the wall is someone’s expression of something.  Art can be your extra something in your day, your treat to yourself, if you just know where to look.

1. Kurt Vonnegut, “Slaughterhouse Five”

Kurt Vonnegut, "Slaughterhouse Five"

3. T.S. Eliot, “The Wasteland”

T.S. Eliot, "The Wasteland"

Eliot took the line “Sweet Thames, run softly, till I end my song” from Edmund Spenser’s Prothalamion. And yes, that is the Thames.

5. George Orwell, “Animal Farm”

George Orwell, "Animal Farm"

6. Margaret Atwood, “The Handmaid’s Tale

Margaret Atwood, "The Handmaid's Tale"

Source: ndla.no

7. J. R. R. Tolkien, “The Fellowship of the Ring”

J. R. R. Tolkien, "The Fellowship of the Ring"

9. William Shakespeare, “Macbeth”

William Shakespeare, "Macbeth"

Source: lausdeo

10. William Blake, “The Marriage of Heaven and Hell”

William Blake, "The Marriage of Heaven and Hell"

Source: flickr.com

11. Emily Dickinson, “I’m Nobody! Who are you?”

Emily Dickinson, "I'm Nobody! Who are you?"

12. William Carlos Williams, “Red Wheelbarrow”

William Carlos Williams, "Red Wheelbarrow"

Source: marklaflaur

13. Edgar Allen Poe, “A Dream Within a Dream”

Edgar Allen Poe, "A Dream Within a Dream"

Source: mermaid99

14. Lewis Carroll, “Alice in Wonderland”

Lewis Carroll, "Alice in Wonderland"

This is based on John Tenniel’s famous illustration of Alice finding the door to Wonderland.

15. Allen Ginsberg, “Howl”

Allen Ginsberg, "Howl"

Source: integraldan

16. William Shakespeare, “Sonnet 116″

William Shakespeare, "Sonnet 116"

Source: etsy.com

17. Joseph Heller, “Catch-22″

Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"

Source: risager

18. J. R. R. Tolkien, “The Fellowship of the Ring”

J. R. R. Tolkien, "The Fellowship of the Ring"

19. George Orwell, “1984″

George Orwell, "1984"

20. Richard Adams, “Watership Down”

Richard Adams, "Watership Down"

Source: orderlyschism

20 Awesome Examples Of Literary Graffiti.

Social Media and Me

I had no idea what photo to choose for this post.

I had no idea what photo to choose for this post.

**since writing this, I have deleted my Google+ , twitter, and Pinterest accounts (and obviously stopped using Bufferapp, reddit, and digg). they just were not adding anything to my life. I did create a new tumblr blog called “Wasp & Pear” that I am still fine tuning. It appears that Tumblr is what facebook should have and could have been:  artistically creative instead of sinister.  Wasp & Pear will be getting push-feeds from my various places, plus content I find while I’m clicking around. It’s like a digest of what I ingest, internetly speaking**

It seems to bet getting to the point where I am losing interest in a lot of the internet.

I have deleted the Facebook app from my phone and really only check it once when I get home from the gym. I still post the daily blog post to it, but am considering even cutting that out at the end of the month. It seems like Facebook has really run it’s course. I have unfriended everyone who over-shares, argues, holds vastly different opinions/beliefs than mine, etc. I read things from people bragging that they have “friends of all beliefs and opinions,” but it is simply not true. These people are not their friends, they are people they are linked to on Facebook, they are not IRL friends. It is sad they do not understand that. Yes, I have deleted people because they have ‘liked’ things that either mean they are thoughtless idiots that like everything without thinking it through or they like things that means they cannot actually like/respect me (if you like Mars Hill Church, you cannot like me, if you like Paul Ryan, you cannot like me, simple fact). I do not have the interest in such internet hypocrisies. I am all-but deleting Facebook because I wish to continue to have a way to contact the people that are on my friends list, most of whom are either distant relatives and former schoolmates/coworkers. If there were an easy way to remove content I have already posted, I would probably ‘wipe’ it down to posts no older than one month. If you’re old enough to have a job and to have a life, you use Facebook exactly as advertised, you look up old friends, or you should. It’s the comment trolls that have ruined Facebook (and the entire internet actually. Why on earth do they allow comments on news stories? If a commenter had something relevant to add, they would have been quoted in the story.)

Do yourself a favor and avoid reading comments of any sort as much as possible, you will feel better about humans.

Obviously, I “chronicle what inspires me” at waldina.com and follow several wordpress hosted blogs. I am also utterly obsessed with brainpickings, letters of note, McSweeney’s, and lifehacker. They are smart, fascinating blogs that I read regularly (and you should too).  If you have a blog on the WordPress platform, you can add me to your reader, there is a RSS link on the right hand side, so you could really add me to any reader.

I tweet and ADN because I enjoy being able to quickly read news headlines and similar updates. I do not understand the desire for people (mostly some sort of self-described ‘coach’) to collect followers and then send out a constant flow of marketing tweets. No one cares and no one appreciates that shotgun approach. My tweets automatically self-destruct after seven days, I see no reason to keep stale tweets around. The media is designed to be of-the-now, so why archive old ones?  But now, I gave it up, I felt like I was requesting that companies try to sell me things.

I adore ADN because it is so tech-heavy and that is really what fascinates me, everyone on there is really smart. Plus, I got to be @spa.

Pinterest? Meh. I am more-or-less over it. It got better once I stopped following the people that were mistakenly using it as Picassa. Like I need to see all the photos of your kids on motorcycles? But unless I am planning a wedding (I am not), I do not really see myself looking at it regularly.  And clearly, I have deleted it.

LinkedIn has not found me a job yet, so I look at it as a required placeholder for that, but I will never submit updates of any kind to it. I will keep my information current, but it seems more like a public resume service than anything else.

Instagram is the best way to just drop a photo out there for whatever reason, I do not feel like it is as needy as posting it on Facebook. I like the filters and I like being able to snap a photo with my phone, play around with the colors and share it.

What is not to like about Words With Friends? I am usually in about four games with different friends and I am usually losing three of them. I am not sure why they continue to play with me, I guess they like winning. I like trying.

Don’t get me wrong, I am no Luddite, I adore technology, newness, convenience, and the amazing things that creative people have been able to create. I even have an IFTTT recipe set up to email me an invite when new start-ups are featured on betali.st. I am excited about the possibilities.

In conclusion (you can click on the hyper links to follow me:

  • Facebook: Over it.
  • Twitter: News headlines, etc. (DELETED)
  • ADN: Smartest people on social media.
  • Pinterest: Ya, I guess I can look at your garden inspiration photo collection. (DELETED)
  • LinkedIn: I would like it more if it worked better for me, it is really designed for professional networking.
  • Instagram: Keep posting photos of stuff you see on the street.
  • Words With Friends: My ass gets kicked regularly.
  • waldina.com:  I chronicle what inspires me and will continue to do so.  I like the blogs I follow and hope to find more.
  • Wasp & Pear:  Bloggers on Tumblr are very very hip.  It’s like you have walked into a party and everyone is talking about art, architecture and film and no one has even mentioned what they do for a living.

Than vs Then – Self Help

Many times people misuse the words “than” and “then.” Whether it’s because the words are pronounced similarly in some areas or because people simply don’t know the difference between them, it is important to know in which situations to choose each word. Follow this guide below, and then you’ll be using these words better than anyone you know!

1. Use than as a word indicating comparison. When you are talking about a noun (thing, person, place or concept) being more, less, better, cooler, dumber, etc. in relation to another noun, the word than is necessary.

There are more onions than scallions in your fridge.
Scott was sicker than a dog last week.

2. Use then as a word indicating time. Use then as a word indicating time. When you want to tell about a sequence of events or are giving instructions in a step-by-step order, the word then is necessary.

First there were four, and then there were two.
Wash the clothes, then put them in the dryer.

3. Pronounce the words differently. Pronounce the words differently. Both words contain one gliding vowel, and they are similar. Phonetically speaking, native speakers of English use the schwa (ǝ, kind of like a soft “eh” sound) because it’s more efficient and allows words to be slurred together quickly in daily conversations. Consequently, lots of “a”s and “e”s are not pronounced distinctly.

Than is said with the mouth opened widely and the tongue pressed down toward the teeth. The vowel sounds from the back of the mouth and the throat is somewhat constricted.
Then is more said with the mouth partially opened. The vowel rises from a relaxed throat and the tongue rests.

4. Test your usage. Test your usage. Ask yourself these questions when you’re writing a sentence:

If I write the word next instead of then, will the sentence still make sense?

I will go to the store next makes sense, so here we would say I will go to the store then.

I like apples better next papayas makes no sense. So we must be looking for I like apples better than papayas.

If I write the phrase in comparison to instead of than, will the sentence still make sense?

It costs more in comparison to a new car makes sense, so you’d want to say It costs more than a new car.

You’ll never guess what happened to me in comparison to does not make sense at all. Now you’ll know you want to say You’ll never guess what happened to me then!

5. Recognize incorrect examples and learn from the mistakes. Recognize incorrect examples and learn from the mistakes.

Wrong: I’m a better speller then you!
Wrong: I feel that astrophysics is less interesting then horticulture.
Wrong: She is going to stop to get snacks, than we’ll go to the library together.
Wrong: Our parents used to go out to eat every now and than.
Right: Learn grammar rules. Then you will be smarter than your average bear.

6. Practice frequently. Practice frequently. Pay attention when you write essays or letters. Use instant messages, e-mails and text messages to practice your good spelling skills (rather than as an opportunity to neglect them). You never know when you’ll have to use one of those communication methods for something important!

Tips:

  • People tend to misuse then more than than.Than mistakes listed above may look strange or grossly incorrect; however, the then mistakes may seem more acceptable. Pay special attention to then and its uses.
  • The simplest mnemonic is that “then” is a time word equivalent to “when,” so they are both spelled with an “e.”
  • Another possible mnemonic aid is is that “then” and “time” both have the letter “e” but not the letter “a,” and “than” and “comparison” both have the letter “a,” but not the letter “e.”

There, Their and They’re – Self Help

The English language is full of problems like the one presented by there, their and they’re. Most native English speakers pronounce these the same way; therefore, it is difficult for some to judge in which situation to use which spelling. Each spelling means a very different thing.

1. Use there when referring to a place, whether concrete (“over there by the building”) or more abstract (“it must be difficult to live there”).

There is an antique store on Camden Avenue.
The science textbooks are over there on the floor.
There are many documents that are used in investigations.

2. Also use there with the verb BE (is, am, are, was, were) to indicate the existence of something, or to mention something for the first time.

There is a picnic area over here, and a monster and a campground across the river.
“I see there are new flowers coming up in your garden.” “Yes, they are the ones my grandmother gave me last year.”

3. Use their to indicate possession. It is a possessive adjective and indicates that a particular noun belongs to them.

My friends have lost their tickets.
Their things were strewn about the office haphazardly.

4. Remember that they’re is a contraction of the words they and are. It can never be used as a modifier, only as a subject (who or what does the action) and verb (the action itself).

Hurry up! They’re closing the mall at six tonight!
I’m glad that they’re so nice to new students here.

5. Test your usage. When you use any of these three words, get in the habit of asking yourself these questions, but remember that they will not work in all cases though:

If you wrote there, will the sentence still make sense if you replace it with here? If so, you’re using it correctly.

If you chose their, will the sentence still make sense if you replace it with our? If so, you’ve chosen the correct word.

If you used they’re, will the sentence still make sense if you replace it with they are? If so, you’re on the right track!

6. Recognize incorrect examples and learn from the mistakes. By looking over others’ work with a critical eye, especially by offering proofreading or copyediting help, you can become more sensitized to correct usage and practice it yourself.

Wrong: Their is no one here.
Wrong: Shelley wants to know if there busy.
Wrong: The dogs are happily chewing on they’re bones.
RIGHT: I can’t believe they’re leaving their children there, alone!

7. Practice, practice, practice! Get your English teacher or friend to say several sentences aloud that include one of these three words and write down which version they are using. Hire a private English tutor if you’re still having trouble.

Tips:

  • Spell out your contractions. Replace can’t with cannotyou’re with you are, and they’re withthey are. This way, you will catch yourself if you make a mistake in writing.
    • The students misplaced they’re books → The students misplaced they are books.
      • Here, the second sentence makes no sense; hence, it is improper usage.
  • Turn off the auto-correct feature in your word processor. People tend to get lazy and forget special rules when the computer automatically corrects mistakes like the ones listed above.
  • If you’re unsure if you’re using “their” correctly, try replacing it with “my” —the sentence should work with the substitution. For example: Their house is purple. If you replace “their” with “my” the sentence still makes sense: My house is purple. So, you know you’re using “their” correctly.
  • If you’ve ruled out “they’re” or “their” as the correct form, then “there” is one you should go with!
  • If you have “there is” or “there are” then it’s always “there” — you’d never say “they’re is” or “they’re are” or “their is” or “their are”.
  • Learning to spell correctly can help you succeed in school, get a great job, and be acontributor to wikiHow articles.
  • Remember there, their, and they’re by the following rules:
    • there: the word here is in there so refer to there as a word for location.
    • their: the word he is in their so refer to their as a word for people.
    • theyre: there is an  in they’re so they’re is like they are. Instead of saying they’re, say they are to see if it makes sense.
  • Another hint: “there” has “here” buried inside it to remind you it refers to place, while “their” has “heir” buried in it to remind you that it has to do with possession
  • Try imagining this scene: you see your neighbours standing outside their house, picking up garbage that they accidentally spilled on the ground. You point at them and say to your friend: “Look over there [location], they’re [they are] picking up their garbage [possession]“

14th (self help) Day of Xmas – ‘Coal to Diamonds’ – You Need This

Beth Ditto‘s book “Coal To Diamonds” is currently available in hardcover and Kindle versions at Amazon.com or at your favorite bookseller.  I have hyperlinked the locations for your convenience.  You should buy this, read this and let it inspire you.

121110-Beth Ditto

Yr Mangled Heart
From an early age, Ditto’s family provided some, let’s say, lax supervision. As she explains, “an old babysitter had taught me to inhale [cigarettes] at the tender age of six . . . I fed my habit by slipping Winstons from Aunt Jannie’s pack during our talk-and-television marathons.”

The Truth
Ditto was under a mistaken impression growing up about whom her actual father was. “My mother told me Homer Ditto was not my father. Nope. Mom had had a fling with some other guy who was my dad. Some dude who didn’t stick around too long who Mom was happy to get rid of. She chose Homer, and Homer chose me, so he lent me his name even though I didn’t have his blood.”

Confessor
Recreational vices and mistaken identity paled in comparison to some of the darker aspects of Ditto’s childhood. “I would say Uncle Lee Roy was a creep. He oozed an inappropriate sexuality . . . Every time we were alone, his hands were everywhere. Down my pants, down my shirt. It was a normal experience — Uncle Lee Roy had been coming at me that way ever since I could remember, beginning when I was about four years old.”

Perfect World
Desperate to get out of Arkansas and enamored with the burgeoning Riot Grrrl movement, Ditto and some friends decide to move to Olympia, Washington and change their lives forever, even in simple ways. “Olympia was a town crawling with music. I was new to the whole punk scene,” she excitedly recalls. “The culture shock continued; Olympia had bagels! We didn’t have bagels in Arkansas. You could order vegetarian food all over town! It was so crazy to me — a place with so many vegetarians, the restaurants made special dishes for them? Being in Olympia was like going off to college. It’s where I got my education.”

Listen Up
Though her weight gives her no small amount of youthful angst, Ditto credits her physicality with birthing her brash performing style. “My size has helped make me an amazing performer too. The cliché of the Funny Fat Friend: I absolutely was that character — I am that character . . . It’s a complicated bag of tools I acquired, and I’ve put them all to work onstage. “

Ain’t It the Truth
Ditto and her band are far more popular in the U.K. than they are in her homeland. She has some very specific ideas about why that is. “Let’s get totally real about it and say that it’s not just taste that keeps Gossip ignored by the U.S. media. It’s sexism, the way women who are outspoken about all the real bullshit females deal with in this world either get ignored or made into jokes.”

Heavy Cross
Ditto makes plain that she’s no ideological dilettante when it comes to feminism. “Girls are taught to sing high and pretty, like Antony, not low and from the guts like Nina Simone. But we’re slowly trying to change that. There are so many things we’re not told growing up, and it’s our true feminist responsibility to take the truth to the people who need to hear it.”

Beth Ditto Bares All In Her Memoir ‘Coal to Diamonds’ | SPIN | Newswire.

Related Reading:

12th (Self Help) Day of Xmas – Don’t Worry

I swear, I cannot get though a week without some sort of Fitzgerald.  I feel like this is advice he is giving his daughter, but it is almost trying to tell her to take a different path than her parents.

fitzgerald scottie

In 1933, renowned author F. Scott Fitzgerald ended a letter to his 11-year-old daughter, Scottie, with a list of things to worry about, not worry about, and simply think about. It read as follows.

(Source: F. Scott Fitzgerald: A Life in Letters; Image: F. Scott Fitzgerald with his daughter, Scottie, in 1924.)

Things to worry about:

  • Worry about courage
  • Worry about cleanliness
  • Worry about efficiency
  • Worry about horsemanship

Things not to worry about:

  • Don’t worry about popular opinion
  • Don’t worry about dolls
  • Don’t worry about the past
  • Don’t worry about the future
  • Don’t worry about growing up
  • Don’t worry about anybody getting ahead of you
  • Don’t worry about triumph
  • Don’t worry about failure unless it comes through your own fault
  • Don’t worry about mosquitoes
  • Don’t worry about flies
  • Don’t worry about insects in general
  • Don’t worry about parents
  • Don’t worry about boys
  • Don’t worry about disappointments
  • Don’t worry about pleasures
  • Don’t worry about satisfactions

Things to think about:

  • What am I really aiming at?
  • How good am I really in comparison to my contemporaries in regard to:
  • (a) Scholarship
  • (b) Do I really understand about people and am I able to get along with them?
  • (c) Am I trying to make my body a useful instrument or am I neglecting it?

With dearest love,

Daddy

via Lists of Note.

11th (Self Help) Day of Xmas – Keep Breathing

I wish I had a letter like that and I wish I believed every last sentence in it.  I often daydream about visiting the 13 or 16 or 19 or 21 year old me and telling him what he needs to know.  To get through school, get out of that town, and never look back.  That all the problems you feel are killing you won’t matter in six months time.  And that the trick is to keep breathing.

In June of 2010, the lead singer of Eels, Mark ‘E’ Everett, wrote a lovely letter of advice to his 16-year-old self. The missive features in the wonderful book, Dear Me, and can be read below.

Transcript follows.

(Source: Dear Me: More Letters to My 16-Year-Old Self; Image of “E” via Gonzai.)

Transcript

Chateau E

June 12, 2010

Dear sweet, naive, 16 year old me,

You poor sap. I know you won’t believe any of this, but you should. How can I get it through your thick, acne-pocked skull? All the stupid things you are so worried about really aren’t very important at all. In fact, they are the opposite of important. What if I told you that all the “winners” around you right now were actually the losers? Well, I just did tell you that, but you still don’t believe me because I’m an adult and 16 year olds can never trust adults.

What if I tried to explain it this way: That feeling you’ve never been able to put a name on — it feels something like, let’s say, a bone-crushing insecurity and cluelessness about your place in the world — just forget about it! That’s right. You can forget about it and go about your days — confident with the knowledge that it’s all going to work out just fine. Because as you get older, you will figure stuff out. A lot of stuff. And that bone-crushing feeling will slowly dissipate. I’m sorry. I can’t remember if you knew what the word “dissipate” meant when you were 16. You will feel it less and less as time goes on. That’s what I meant to say.

And all those “winners” who appear at the top of their games and lives are indeed, just that: at their peaks! It’s all downhill for those idiots from here. Ha! Come on, let’s have a laugh. At their expense! It’s okay. You’ve earned it!

While YOU get to do the opposite: Things will just get better and better for you. And here’s the best part: It turns out that girls like geeky smart guys much more than dumb sports guys. For many reasons. You’ll see. So relax, man. Just relax. And I can even pass along this shocking piece of information: You will enjoy your life in your 40s! You heard me. It’s gonna be great!

Now, I’m not saying it’s not going to come with some serious bumps in the road along the way, but don’t worry. Those bumps are the very thing that will make you a better person along the way and make you appreciate yourself and the world around you more and more. So you can stop worrying about the mean kids around you and stop putting any energy into being mean yourself. Ignore all that crap and enjoy the nice things in your life. Now how ’bout a smile? No? Well, you ARE 16. I get it. But I can tell you’re smiling just a little on the inside.

Sincerely,

(Signed, ‘E’)

A Fully Grown Man Called E

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via Letters of Note: Things will just get better and better.